Takulandilani…My First Visitor Has Come and Gone

On October 15 at 12:20pm I had my first visitor arrive from the United States. Takulandilani, you are most welcome. Dan traveled the 9000+ miles, across the big pond, all the way to little Malawi. I met him at the airport, which brought weird feelings of nostalgia for the day I came to Malawi. Seeing all the planes come in and out made me think about how far away (physically) I am from the people I love in the United States. However, it also made me appreciate even more that one of those people would be arriving on one of those planes and that I get to share my beautiful experience and the country of Malawi with that someone, a someone who knows little if not nothing about it.

A few days after Dan’s arrival, after spending some time in the city, we headed back to my life in the village. Little did I realize the challenges that I would face having a visitor from the United States stay with me for a month in my small home, in my small village, with my small community of friends that he knew very little about before he got there. It made me realize that there are really only some experiences you can live in order to understand. And as much as I told Dan about my life in Malawi, until he got here I think he really had no clue about the realities of this kind of living, as would no one. These are experiences I want to share in my blog because they are things that the excitement leading up to the actual arrival of having a visitor overpowers, and this pre-excitement doesn’t allow you think about how difficult it actually might be to have someone who is completely unfamiliar and foreign from this lifestyle come and stay with you. I also want to share this experience as a preface to how it may be for you if you plan on visiting me here in Malawi, but with hopefully a few improvements as I become better with hosting my visitors in my home in Chipoka.

For example, something I need to work on; I realized how much of a control freak I am when it comes to the way I do things in my home. Gosh, poor Dan. I never understood how much I really need (or maybe just really want) to do it my way. Dan was always trying to help, and here I was like, “No, that’s not where that goes, that’s not how you do that,” when really there’s not one way to start a fire or wash the dishes, or your clothes, and it doesn’t really matter if my jar of PB is on the left side of my table or the right. This is something I DEFINITELY need to work on, and I would love to blame on the stress that came with having a constant friend in my home when I’ve been used to living on my own for six months, but that just seems like an escape from working on bettering my flaws.

Another thing that was very challenging and sometimes exhausting for me was feeling like my visitor was dependent on me in order to live. Now maybe this isn’t as literal as it sounds, and this feeling definitely improved with the longer Dan was in Malawi, but in the beginning this place was so new to him I’m not sure how I could have ever expected anything else. I was blessed in the fact that Dan is an adventurous soul himself and already knows how to start a fire, doesn’t mind having to poop in a hole, and understands that not having electricity isn’t the worst thing in the world. For others these might have been more of challenges than they were for Dan. But areas that were still difficult for us were things like Dan not being able to speak in the local language, taking care of him while he was sick, and not understanding how he didn’t enjoy the Malawian food as much as I do, etc.

Living here and integrating into a place and learning Chichewa and the culture of Malawi has made me appreciate this country so much more. Living here and integrating is what makes me different from my visitors. I understand a lot of the language and cultural practices, but these are new things to a visitor. Always needing to depend on my Chichewa to get us places, or buy things at the market, or just greet people in my village made me feel like I was the one who needed to take care of us. Saying mwadzuka bwanji (good morning) has become second nature to me and I don’t even think about it anymore, but it was something I had to remember that Dan didn’t know, and because of this I also responded for him when people asked how he was. He learned more and more as he as here, and it’s not like I learned Chichewa in a month. I’ve been here 7 months and am still learning. It was just frustrating sometimes when I felt like I had to do the majority of the talking for the both of us.

Also something that was difficult for me to relate to now, as it has changed for me as I’ve lived in Chipoka for a long time, is realizing that not everyone wants to eat things they don’t really enjoy eating. For me I’ve learned to eat the food that is available to me in the village, and not really complain about it. Being a picky eater isn’t really an option, if you want to eat at all. There is a lot of the same food everyday, and it’s not like you can just go to the grocery store and buy ingredients for foods you’re craving. I know Dan was mostly joking, but I can’t tell you the amount of times when I asked him what he wanted for lunch, he replied with, a club sandwich. I just wanted to shake him. Like yeah right, you’ll have to go back to the States for that luxury buddy.

Of course the experience also had a beautiful side to it! Having a human I care so much about coming all the way from the States just to come to see me gave me so many good feels. It was so nice to talk about things I feel so far away from in the United States. To hear about what friends are doing, and if Donald Trump is really running for president or if that was just something the media decided to make up for good laughs. It was so nice to share the projects I am doing in Chipoka with Dan and have someone around who even wanted to help me with these projects, and be a part of my everyday life here in Malawi. Dan was a great support and help for the permagarden my SOLID trainees implemented at my health center while he was here, and also took some very awesome pictures. I am thankful for his visit and have learned a lot from it. Being somewhere new is not as simple as it may seem, but what you learn and gain from these opportunities are experiences you will remember for a lifetime.

Playing and taking breaks in the garden.

p.s. Tom had puppies while Dan was here. She only had two, thank goodness. Below I’ve posted some pictures of them because they are SOOO adorable. Video Credit: Dan.

Snuggles with Dan

Tom and babies after birth

It's never to hot for snuggles

Luna likes to play dead haha

My landlord decided to keep Tom's male puppy, who I named Rolfus....firstly because when he was born he looked like Kim Possible's naked mole-rat, and secondly after my college chemisty teacher haha. Isn't he cute??

Lunch TIme

Playing in the dirt

Saying goodbye to Luna. I gave her to one of my Malawian friends who is the manager of a nearby lodge. I think she'll be happy and well fed here #meatandnsima

#peacecorps